Learn how to Be a Higher Good friend In accordance with Proverbs
Glancing via my texts, I got here throughout one from a pal inviting me to lunch. After politely declining, I believed to myself, “I’m a horrible pal. Poor Susan should suppose I’ve deserted her.” Whereas I wished to be there for my pal, I made little effort to take action. The Lord had blessed me with a pricey pal, however I had taken our friendship as a right. Tearfully, I requested God to point out me tips on how to be a greater pal.
What Does Proverbs Train Us about Friendship?
Proverbs teaches that friendship needs to be marked by love, loyalty, honesty, knowledge, discretion, generosity, and encouragement that helps each associates develop in godliness. In our fast-paced society, the place a fast textual content has taken the place of real dialog, investing in a friendship can appear a frightening job. Though balancing the calls for of household and profession leaves little time to nurture {our relationships}, it can be crucial that we achieve this if we want to have lasting friendships. Proverbs provides us sensible knowledge for Christian friendship by displaying us not solely what sort of associates to decide on, however what sort of pal we’re referred to as to turn out to be.
Listed below are 10 Proverbs that educate us tips on how to be higher associates to the individuals in our lives. These Proverbs about friendship present {that a} godly pal is just not solely current in simple seasons however is loving, reliable, smart, loyal, sincere, reliable, discreet, beneficiant, and prepared to assist others develop.
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1. A Good Good friend Is Loving
“A pal loves always, and a brother is born for adversity.” Proverbs 17:17 (ESV)
When you concentrate on the that means of friendship, what involves thoughts? Friendship is a relationship between two individuals based mostly on mutual care, belief, respect, and help. Pals share frequent pursuits, take pleasure in being collectively, and admire one another. Past merely liking and caring for our associates, Proverbs teaches us that we must always love them all the time—in good instances and in unhealthy. Greater than an emotional connection, loving our associates requires a dedication on our half.
Once we love our associates, we love them with the identical love Jesus has for us. Jesus demonstrated His love by laying down His life for us. He instructs us to do the identical in 1 John 3:16, “By this we all know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to put down our lives for the brothers.” As we search to turn out to be higher associates, our love for each other binds us collectively.
Reflection query: How can I be a greater pal by loving and supporting my associates once they want me?
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2. A Good Good friend Is Reliable
“Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, however a person of understanding stays silent. Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets and techniques, however he who’s reliable in spirit retains a factor coated.” Proverbs 11:12–13
The author of Proverbs understood that we should construct our friendships on a basis of belief. To be reliable means we’re worthy of one other particular person’s confidence. We don’t converse negatively about our associates behind their backs or reveal secrets and techniques they spoke to us in non-public. Who hasn’t recognized somebody who can’t hold a secret? When somebody we predict we are able to belief divulges intimate particulars of our lives or spreads rumors about us, it’s devastating. If an in depth pal breaks our belief, it’s heartbreaking.
If we want to be a superb pal to others, we should honor our friendship by holding the tales they share with us near our hearts. Now we have nothing to realize by repeating our pal’s confidential info–and every little thing to lose. The muse of a phenomenal friendship is being a reliable pal.
Reflection query: What modifications do I must make to be a extra reliable pal to the individuals I care about?
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3. A Good Good friend Is Sensible
Whoever walks with the smart turns into smart, however the companion of fools will endure hurt.” Proverbs 13:20
Have you learnt somebody who is sensible? How about an individual who behaves foolishly? I’ve recognized individuals who appear to gravitate in direction of bother–– and drag others proper together with them. In the case of our associates, we have to be cautious which of them we select as a result of “unhealthy firm corrupts good character” (1 Corinthians 15:33).
The world is filled with fools, however really smart associates are a treasure to carry on to. However how will we turn out to be smart? The Bible teaches us to let the phrase of Christ dwell in us richly, instructing and admonishing each other in all knowledge (Colossians 3:16). Whereas individuals possess a range of opinions, the phrase of God guides us in tips on how to give sound recommendation and godly counsel to our associates, particularly to those that are making silly choices. Among the finest methods to be a superb pal is to be an instance of knowledge, not solely in phrase however in motion.
Reflection query: How can I be a greater pal by looking for to develop in knowledge and understanding via God’s phrase?
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4. A Good Good friend Is Loyal
“A person of many companions might come to smash, however there’s a pal who sticks nearer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24
My mom used to inform me that if I have been fortunate, I might be capable to rely on one hand the quantity of people that can be my lifelong associates. “Pals come and go in life,” she mentioned. “Some are right here for under a season. Few will likely be with you for the long term.” Mother was proper. Whereas I’ve had some good associates in my life, my few closest associates are uncommon treasures.
God by no means supposed for us to be loners on this world. Solomon, in his knowledge, wrote in Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, “Two are higher than one, as a result of they’ve a superb reward for his or her toil. For in the event that they fall, one will elevate up his fellow. However woe to him who’s alone when he falls and has not one other to elevate him up!” Could we be the form of pal who’s loyal, who sticks shut, and who stays steadfast for years to come back.
Reflection query: How can I be a loyal pal to somebody who feels alone or rejected?
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5. A Good Good friend Is Trustworthy
“Higher is open rebuke than hidden love. Trustworthy are the injuries of a pal; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.” Proverbs 27:5–6
Once I was a baby, there was a cartoon character named Jiminy Cricket who sang just a little ditty, “Honesty, it doesn’t matter what the results be, is the perfect coverage.” There was one thing a few cricket sporting a prime hat that made the tune extra memorable. As an grownup, it’s not all the time simple to stay by this motto, particularly when it means hurting those I really like. Does the Bible instruct us to be sincere, even on the expense of our associates’ emotions?
Whereas it ought to by no means be our intent to harm others, the Bible exhorts us to “converse the reality in love” (Ephesians 4:15). Are you prepared to deal with the sin in your pal’s life if doing so could also be laborious for them to obtain? Humbly ask the Lord to point out you tips on how to share your issues along with your pal in a method that can provide hope and therapeutic to their soul.
Reflection query: How can I lovingly share my issues with my pal with out seeming judgmental?
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6. A Good Good friend Is Reliable
“Many a person proclaims his steadfast love, however a trustworthy man who can discover?” Proverbs 20:6
One of the vital cherished qualities of a superb pal is dependability. To be a reliable pal is to be dependable and somebody others can rely on. It’s possible you’ll know an unreliable particular person, somebody who promised to be there for you however then backed out on the final minute. Whereas they could have supposed to maintain their phrase, they allow you to down by failing to maintain their dedication. You will have finished the identical to your mates earlier than and later regretted it.
I need to be the pal others can depend upon, one who’s there for them once they want me. Matthew 5:37 exhorts us, “Let what you say be ‘Sure’ or ‘No’; something greater than this comes from evil.” This implies our associates can depend upon us to be there for them. Let’s make it our objective to be higher associates by being reliable, protecting our phrase, and displaying up for our associates who want us.
Reflection query: How can I be a greater pal by being there for individuals once they want me?
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7. A Good Good friend Is Righteous
“One who’s righteous is a information to his neighbor, however the best way of the depraved leads them astray.” Proverbs 12:26
This proverb warns in opposition to hanging out with depraved individuals. To be depraved is to be ungodly, morally corrupt, and evil. Whereas associates ought to have a constructive affect on one another’s lives, this isn’t all the time the case. The Bible admonishes us to abhor what’s evil and maintain quick to what’s good (Romans 12:9). A superb pal warns the individuals they care about of the chance of being led astray by evil individuals.
The apostle John admonished his followers, “Little kids, let nobody deceive you. Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he’s righteous” (1 John 3:7). As believers in Jesus Christ, we’ve a duty to guide others by instance. If we want to have a constructive affect of their lives, we must always search to stay in a fashion that honors God by the phrases we converse, the choices we make, and the actions we take. A righteous pal doesn’t assume superiority over others; she seeks to stay humbly earlier than God and gently level her associates towards what’s true and good.
Reflection query: How can I’ve a constructive affect on my associates by residing in a fashion that pleases and honors God?
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8. A Good Good friend Is Discreet
“Whoever covers an offense seeks love, however he who repeats a matter separates shut associates.” Proverbs 17:9
Have you ever ever confessed your ethical failure to somebody, solely to have them repeat it to others? While you confided in your pal, you thought they’d deal with your secret with discretion. Sadly, as an alternative, they gossiped about you. I need to confess that I even have repeated issues I promised to maintain confidential. My lack of discretion has damage others, however I’ve discovered from these experiences to protect my phrases with regards to others’ affairs.
1 Peter 4:8 encourages us with these phrases, “Above all, hold loving each other earnestly, since love covers a large number of sins.” Love covers sin; it doesn’t reveal it. If our pal confesses their sin to us, we’re to forgive them and never repeat it. If they’re sinning, we who’re religious ought to go to them and restore them in a spirit of gentleness (Galatians 6:1). As we search to be higher associates to these we love, let’s make discretion a precedence.
Reflection query: In what methods can I be a greater pal by masking offenses as an alternative of repeating them to others?
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9. A Good Good friend Is Beneficiant
“Whoever despises his neighbor is a sinner, however blessed is he who’s beneficiant to the poor.” Proverbs 14:21
What does it imply to be beneficiant? Being beneficiant with our assets means we’re open-handed in our giving. As a result of God offers for us, we are able to share these blessings with the individuals in our lives who want our assist. Not solely ought to we be beneficiant with our materials possessions, however we’re additionally to be beneficiant with our time, assist, and a spotlight. I really like the promise in Luke 6:38, “give, and it is going to be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken collectively, working over, will likely be put into your lap. For with the measure you utilize it is going to be measured again to you.”
Are there individuals in your life with whom you may be beneficiant? It’s possible you’ll be struggling financially your self proper now. That’s okay. There are various methods to be beneficiant towards others. Sharing a meal, serving to round their home, or offering a listening ear are methods you may be beneficiant with the presents God has given you.
Reflection query: What assets do I’ve that I can generously share with my associates right this moment?
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10. A Good Good friend Helps You Develop
“Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens one other.” Proverbs 27:17
My finest pal of over 50 years has a outstanding method of encouraging me in my calling and function. She sees my God-given presents and skills, in addition to the brand new alternatives for development that the Lord brings my method. She is a superb cheerleader who believes in me and sees my potential. I attempt to do the identical for her.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 instructs us to “encourage each other and construct each other up, simply as you might be doing.” Are you within the behavior of encouraging your mates? Do you acknowledge their presents and skills? Are you prepared to problem them to succeed in their full potential?
Together with encouragement, we’ve the duty to exhort one another in our religion. “However exhort each other day by day, so long as it’s referred to as ‘right this moment,’ that none of you could be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin” (Hebrews 3:13). When associates mutually encourage and exhort one another, we sharpen one another. And that’s what associates are for.
Reflection query: How can I encourage my associates within the function and calling God has for his or her lives?
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A Prayer for Good Pals
Lord Jesus.
I need to be a superb pal to the individuals you carry into my life, however it may be laborious. Whereas I’ve good intentions, I typically permit to get in the best way of my friendships. Thanks for these ten proverbs that educate me tips on how to be a greater pal. I’m grateful to replicate on these verses as I attempt to be a blessing to my associates. Could I really like my associates as You’re keen on me by honoring Your commandment to “love your neighbor as your self” (Matthew 22:39).
Assist me all the time to be loving, reliable, smart, loyal, sincere, reliable, righteous, discreet, beneficiant, and refined in direction of my associates. I pray I’ll carry You glory in the best way I deal with my associates. Could I keep in mind to place their wants earlier than my very own as I willingly lay down my life for them. 1 Corinthians 13:13 tells us, “So now religion, hope, and love abide, however the biggest of those is love.” As I look to be a greater pal, might I begin by being a loving pal to the individuals you carry into my life?
Thanks, Jesus.
Amen.
Regularly Requested Questions on Proverbs and Friendship
- What does Proverbs say about friendship?
Proverbs teaches that good friendship is loving, loyal, reliable, sincere, smart, discreet, reliable, beneficiant, and prepared to assist one other particular person develop. - What is an effective Proverb about friendship?
Proverbs 17:17 is among the clearest verses about friendship: “A pal loves always, and a brother is born for adversity.” - How can I be a greater pal in response to the Bible?
You generally is a higher pal by loving constantly, protecting confidences, talking fact with gentleness, providing encouragement, being reliable, and looking for your pal’s good. - What does “iron sharpens iron” imply in friendship?
“Iron sharpens iron” means trustworthy associates assist one another develop via encouragement, smart counsel, loving correction, and religious accountability. - How do I do know if a friendship is sensible or silly?
A smart friendship attracts you nearer to fact, godliness, humility, and love. A silly friendship leads you towards gossip, compromise, satisfaction, sin, or hurt.
For Additional Studying
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Daybreak Ward is an writer, speaker, and Bible trainer. She is the founding father of The Religion to Flourish, a ministry equipping girls to flourish of their lives via inspiring instructing, mentoring, and biblical assets. The ministry additionally helps and encourages girls with addicted family members.
Daybreak is married to Steve and mother to 3 grownup kids. Together with writing and serving within the Ladies’s Ministry of her native church, she is attending seminary the place she is finding out for a Masters of Arts in Theological Research.
Daybreak’s guide, From Guilt to Grace: Hope and Therapeutic for Christian Mothers of Addicted Kids is a labor of affection and is now out there. Join with Daybreak at https://www.thefaithtoflourish.com.
Initially printed Monday, 24 August 2026.
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